Or am I? Apparently not. What am I talking about? The dreaded "M" word...MENOPAUSE! Not PERI-menopausal, I'm in full blow menopause and apparently have been for a few years now. I have been going through it for the last 3 or so years meaning it started in my late 30s. Good thing I had my kids at a young age since the baby factory decided to shut down early.
Well at least one good thing about this, it explains a lot of the symptoms that I've had over the years. My gyn is calling in an HRT prescription for me. Not exactly sure which one it is yet. God knows there's a plethora of them out there. As I've done research about HRT (hormone replacement therapy)-I've always struggled with the pros and cons. A few years ago it was highly suggested that I never take HRT "when the time comes." This is because of my strong family history of breast cancer. (My mom died of breast ca at the age of 47-just five years older than myself) However, more current research shows that estrogen doesn't so much cause breast cancer but accelerates it once diagnosed. Who knows what the real story is. I've decided to go on HRT for now. The symptoms that I am having are maddening. I'll take the risk, for now. I don't plan on being on this indefinitely.
Hopefully my doc orders something with estrogen and progesterone. Apparently taking estrogen without progesterone puts you at high risk for uterine cancer. This is obviously only if you haven't had a hysterectomy. I still have all of my girly parts.
I had noticed some physical and mental changes in myself over the years. I guess they just came on so slightly that I didn't make the connection. Now that its more pronounced, I knew something was up. I'm almost always hot! I haven't really gotten the "hot flashes"-its just that I get overheated easily and then its hard to cool down. My skin looks like shit, I'll tell you that! Dry and just blah! That's from a huge loss of collagen. Hopefully the HRT will improve that. And my hair!! Oh my poor, poor hair! It has literally been falling out in clumps. Hopefully the HRT remedies that also. I'm still going to get most of it cut off. Nothing looks worse than someone with long, stringy, thin, lifeless, dull, dry, brittle hair. My daughter, the cosmo, doesn't want to cut it. She says she loves my long hair. Ugh! It looks like shit!
I have a lot of the other symptoms of menopause. Absence of a period being the most obvious. Now that is a plus! No more annoying time of the month, cramps, bitchiness...well, I'm still bitchy but again, hopefully the HRT helps.
I really don't have anyone to chit-chat about menopause with. Most of my friends are around my age but they still have their cycles. Obviously my mom and grandma are gone. I could mention it to my step-mom but she and I aren't exactly chummy. I do have a friend who is scheduled for a hysterectomy next week. This will throw her into menopause but I don't know if we'll have the same symptoms since hers in surgically induced.
So, I supposed I'll troll the Internet and find a menopause group. Oh joy. Eh, its not that big of a deal and I'll get over it. A lot of women totally freak out about menopause and insist that their sex life is over, etc. I just don't give a rat's ass about my sex life...or lack thereof. But, I guess that's part of menopause. The libido tanks.
Regardless, its not the end of the world and I'll get through it. On to a new phase of life...
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